My Beautiful Blog

An Actualiser's weblog


… inequity.

I couldn’t put the two words together as the heading for my blog; my beautiful little blog… But I have to speak on this.

I have long felt in my gut that the only deficit in humanity lies in ignorance.

It is a kind way to say, ‘If people only recognised the harm they are doing by acting out against others by their words and actions, they would surely not do such things anymore! ‘It is the ‘high road’ position; the compassionate Me speaking.

And I would have to say I’ve been doing my little bit to create awareness of consequences of thoughtless action, as have many of my very concerned and humanitarian friends and colleagues.

But ignorance is indeed the order of the day and, when coupled with the legitimacy that society presently gives to harm without a major accountability, efforts to keep the divisions among us are persisting.

The separations have a long history as we know; to many it is their only identity. ‘He’ takes the role of Boss, or leader or decision maker; ‘We’ take the role of ardent follower, ‘or else…’, and ‘own thought’ takes a regular backseat since’ I’ will be more ‘comfortable’ if I don’t get into trouble with the Boss!

It’s part of socialisation, yes… I think we’ve heard just about every excuse for why this happens. So let’s not go there. Let us ask ourselves how by our actions we might be very well perpetuating so many of the painful inequities, particularly in power relationships, which are in our lives.

I am recalling two incidents this year, in fact, where I, just by being myself, got the ‘raised eyebrow’ and indeed the ‘helpful warning’ because I was being different. The two persons in question had both had deep discussions with me about the importance of rebalancing the dynamics of society, and all of those high-minded subjects. But the instant I did these two things in their presence [will speak more on it shortly], the ‘fear warning’ came into play.

In the first instance I had just moved into a new house and took the master bedroom. There was evidence that the previous occupant had positioned the bed in a particular location. In my judgment, my bed was better positioned in a different way. My – till then –  progressive house mate walked into my room and rather than give me some tips to decorate, quite promptly says ‘You know the bed is supposed to be set up over there…’. I was so stunned I took a bit of time before I responded. I said ‘I would like it over here for the breeze…’. It seemed incredible that I’d even have to explain this. Several other incidents later confirmed that indeed I was considered to be ‘trouble’, and well, let’s just say, my ‘friend’ unceremoniously bailed when a call had to be made between supporting me and the old-school landlady in a disagreement. She still wanted the privilege of being called my friend, however 🙂

The second event was where I wanted to walk on the grass barefooted. I consider this to be one of the simple, accessible pleasures of life and perfectly natural. This new person said to me ‘You know you are not wearing shoes…?’ And I thought, ‘Why is she telling me this?’ I couldn’t even think of a response! I think I blubbered out something like ‘I like to do that sometimes!’ But I got the strong feeling that I was being slotted into the category of loony or something like that.

Now, there have been many MANY such events over the years and none of the persons giving the warnings are friends or indeed in my circle now. But I ask myself all the time, ‘What are these people saying to their children?… to the youth in their circles?’

Are they perpetuating the idea that you better not choose to literally make your own bed up ‘for your own good?’ And, extending the thought, that you better not do anything too simple and natural, or else you will be considered a nutter?

I am witnessing so many ‘adults’ who master following and hand over their right of free will, own judgment and simple contribution to society, and it is ALARMING to me! Because, it means that we are perpetuating the inequities in power through our action, and also in our inaction…

Many young and culturally exposed persons like myself [I walked away from the exploitative capitalism model at 31] are understanding purpose, giftedness, connection and even responsibility spontaneously and are confused then by the absence of any emphasis on these concepts by the designated guides. We can end up very VERY confused, and feeling bombarded by societal pressures to conform to irresponsibility. This is not to say that many adults are not passing the ‘greater good’ word on; but I’m concerned about how many are relying on someone else to take on this responsibility.

Having seen the volume and degree of separationist rhetoric that is prevailing on the mainstream media, that ‘someone else’ communicating quite loudly, legitimately and vehemently, isn’t appearing to be a greater good kinda guy…

Are we ok? Where are we, really?

I would like to hear.

With blessings and a still dominant belief that Good will prevail ultimately, and prayerfully in my lifetime,




September 17, 2009 - Posted by | Uncategorized


  1. nice one sherri.

    keep your head str8 and your heart strong.


    Comment by rHaj | September 17, 2009 | Reply

  2. I don’t know If I said it already but …Cool site, love the info. I do a lot of research online on a daily basis and for the most part, people lack substance but, I just wanted to make a quick comment to say I’m glad I found your blog. Thanks, 🙂

    A definite great read..Tony Brown

    Comment by Tony Brown | September 24, 2009 | Reply

  3. Sheesh! I thought I’d better stop reading and leave a comment or two, Sherrilene! It’s easy to start at the top and read thru all your blogs without stopping!

    I’d like to know where on this planet you are looked down upon for going barefoot in the grass?! I can tell you where you’ll look funny for going barefoot and GASP! wading in a man made trickling stream in the heat of summer… a golf course! LOL Yessiree! That would be me on my not so honey moon on a golf course (not my thing, my now ex husband’s)in Arizona in August. It was hot. The grass was cool and the water feature was also cool. I too took off my shoes and waded right in.

    The looks my direction showed the error of my ways but I kept right on with it! I hope you did too and also kept your bed in the breeze…

    My thoughts are this… keep doing the small, perfectly you, things you do. It will raise eyebrows. It will elicit a scolding perhaps. And maybe, just maybe, someone else will say to themselves, “I’m going to climb a tree in my finest clothes because this is the right time and the clothes don’t matter.” They’ll be inspired by you to be themselves!

    Hugz and Smiles!

    Comment by Amber | October 8, 2009 | Reply

  4. Exuse me dear Sherri but I had to giggle a bit reading this because I was reminded of my own sillyness sometimes of wanting things in a particular way in my house when i am decorating. Sometimes it has pure practical(at least for me)reasons, sometimes it’s just my feeling of estethics, or perphaps I am just slightly neurotic, lol! And I realize it might be enoying for whoever stays with me lol! But then again it is my space and i pay the rent for it. And that is exactly the point, you are free to give the space you rent a personal note. I get from your story that the roommate was the landlady, so perhaps she had control issues and apparantly finds it hard to let go if there wasn’t any real practical relevant reason for that bed not to be moved. It is a pity that the situation couldn’t really evolve by really opening up to each other in order to gain a greater understanding of each others perspective.
    Anyway, I do get your point but people are people and no one’s perfect. Life offers us many of those moments of challenge and sometimes they’re just akward, sometimes aggrevating ennoying and sometimes they are downright painful. And we have to learn to deal with this in the most elegant way we can.
    Sweety, I’ll share with you the last lines of a poem I wrote long ago:
    “……I am left alone with nothing but my dancing shoes!
    Yes, I know the graceful joys of silks and perfumes
    but I love to run beside you
    barefoot in the grass…..”

    Love Ya!

    Comment by Lucienne | December 21, 2009 | Reply

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